1 Powerful Question You Need To Regularly Ask Yourself To Unlock A Great Life
Where your attention goes, energy flows.
Early in my career, I'd obsessively try to do everything that popped into my tiny genius of a brain — so I thought. Then, I'd light the torch and set my wick on fire, watching it ruthlessly burn from both ends.
Nothing was ever enough.
At one point, I went back to get my MBA while running the family business. I was "hustling" from five to eight, every-damn-day.
I'd never change it, as it taught me many important life lessons, but I was far from focused.
I brought my shotgun to a sniper party. I just pulled the trigger, aiming at whatever was in front of me. Nothing was executed with precision.
Then, my first son was born.
One day, I looked at myself in the mirror and said, "this isn't how you live a great life." All I do is work in my business — my business became my prison. I built something great, but it demanded so much of me. It was a vampire clinging to my neck, slowly sucking my life away, drip-by-drip.
I thought there had to be more to life than just waking up, getting ready, commuting to work, working, and commuting home.
Then, I shifted more attention to my family because I didn't want to miss anything when my first son was born.
I was neglecting this life domain in so many ways.
So, I started to think:
What makes a rotten life?
"One that's not integrated with all the important domains of life," I introspectively answered.
A life that doesn't blend work, purpose, family, health, spirituality, and other vital domains is a far less happy life.
Sometimes, work is going to be a dominant force.
Other times, it might lean heavily on family—as it did for me when all three of my children entered my life or having to take an active role in helping my parents deal with my father's stage 4 lung cancer.
And let me be clear:
This isn't about work-life balance — that's a hoax.
There's no such thing as work-life balance, as all we have is one life, no matter how we slice and dice it.
A rotten life is one where:
You don't have the discipline for the things that matter most.
You let your emotions control your decisions and reactions.
You let external situations impact your internal peace.
You're controlled by what you have or don't have.
You let your health suffer due to poor choices.
You live to eat instead of eating to live.
You don't have compassion for others.
You don't know what's important.
You don't prioritize your family.
You're mean to others.
You indulge in excess.
You don't sleep good.
You have no purpose.
You're not mindful.
So ask yourself:
Am I ROTting away today?
ROT stands for Return On Time.
You die a little more with every second that passes. Life is constantly sucked from your veins, death looming with every drip.
We rarely look at time as an investment, and we should.
Time is the ultimate investment. Yet, so much of what we do has a shitty return.
Your return on time is the positive value you create not only in your life but the lives of others.
Are you doing what you love? Are you engaging in beautiful conversations? Are you spending time with people you love? Are you creating value? Are you staying healthy? Are you learning and growing?
Life is about integration, where all the essential pieces come together in a way that works for us in that moment.
The key is attention and intention.
The more attention we give something, the more energy flows to it.
The more intention we put into something, the more focus we give it.
It means we recognize all the crucial pieces of our lives and are intentional about how we want to show up in the world. Some years, you might focus your attention and intention more on work. In other years, it might be more focused on another area.
But you should always integrate your mind, body, spirit, and family. There's never a good reason to push these aside.
The one constant is that you're always aware of your choices and the attention you give to different areas of your life.
The more we become aware of our choices, the more control we have over our lives.
The more control we have over our lives, the more happiness we can create.
But, integrating life domains at various stages is crucial.
These all contribute to a lower ROT score.
So, as you look at your calendar for the day or your massive task list, ask yourself, am I going to be rotten today?
Will this add value to my life? Will this help me achieve my ambitious goals? Will this better me or my most important relationships?
If not, delete it. Stop wasting time on the things that don't matter so you can invest your time in the things that do.
